Ryerson University Gets a Boring New Name

And so it came to pass that Ryerson University, formerly Ryerson Polytechnic, was renamed “Toronto Metropolitan University”.

You’d think with so many smart and creative people who are, no doubt, in reach of the university naming committee, that they would have picked something displaying a tad more imagination.

Ye gods and demons! Doesn’t Toronto already have a “University of Toronto” which, as I recall, is in Metropolitan Toronto? Were they all short for time? On their way to a gender reveal party (involving lots of explosives) being filmed for an epic and soon to be viral TikTok video, or something equally pressing? You can imagine the discussions that went on as having gone something like this?”

So, what shall we name the University that was a College that was Ryerson? Let’s get some ideas, people!”

“Well, let’s see… it’s a university in Metropolitan Toronto and…”

“PERFECT! “Toronto Metropolitan University”, it is! Meeting adjourned! Meet you all at the pub in 20 minutes!”

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